Bullets & Billets
60 Pages
English

Bullets & Billets

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Published 08 December 2010
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The Project Gutenberg EBook of Bullets & Billets, by Bruce Bairnsfather This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net
Title: Bullets & Billets Author: Bruce Bairnsfather Release Date: February 23, 2004 [EBook #11232] Language: English Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK BULLETS & BILLETS ***
Produced by Jonathan Ingram, Steven desJardins, and Distributed Proofreaders
  
  
  
Bullets & Billets
By Bruce Bairnsfather
1916
TO MY OLD PALS, "BILL," "BERT," AND "ALF," WHO HAVE SAT IN THE MUD WITH ME
CONTENTS
CHAPTER I  Landing at Havre—Tortoni's—Follow the tram lines—Orders  for the Front. CHAPTER II  Tortuous travelling—Clippers and tablets—Dumped at a  siding—I join my Battalion. CHAPTER III  Those Plugstreet trenches—Mud and rain—Flooded out—A  hopeless dawn. CHAPTER IV  More mud—Rain and bullets—A bit of cake—"Wind up"—Night  rounds. CHAPTER V  My man Friday—"Chuck us the biscuits —Relieved—Billets. " CHAPTER VI  The Transport Farm—Fleeced by the Flemish—Riding—Nearing  Christmas. CHAPTER VII  A projected attack—-Digging a sap—An 'ell of a night—The  attack—Puncturing Prussians. CHAPTER VIII  Christmas Eve—A lull in hate—Briton cum Boche. CHAPTER IX  Souvenirs—A ride to Nieppe—Tea at H.Q.—Trenches once more. CHAPTER X  My partial escape from the mud—The deserted village—My "cottage."   CHAPTER XI  Stocktaking—Fortifying—Nebulous Fragments. CHAPTER XII  A brain wave—Making a "funk hole"—Plugstreet Wood—Sniping.
CHAPTER XIII  Robinson Crusoe—That turbulent table. CHAPTER XIV  The Amphibians—Fed-up, but determined—The gun parapet. CHAPTER XV  Arrival of the "Johnsons"—"Where did that one go?"—The  First Fragment dispatched—The exodus—Where? CHAPTER XVI  New trenches—The night inspection—Letter from the   Bystander. CHAPTER XVII  Wulverghem—The Douve—Corduroy boards—Back at our farm. CHAPTER XVIII  The painter and decorator—Fragments forming—Night on the  mud prairie. CHAPTER XIX  Visions of leave—Dick Turpin—Leave! CHAPTER XX  That Leave train—My old pal—London and home—The call of  the wild. CHAPTER XXI  Back from leave—That "blinkin' moon"—Johnson 'oles—Tommy  and "frightfulness"—Exploring expedition. CHAPTER XXII  A daylight stalk—The disused trench—"Did they see me?"—A  good sniping position. CHAPTER XXIII  Our moated farm—Wulverghem—The Curé's house—A shattered  Church—More "heavies"—A farm on fire. CHAPTER XXIV  That ration fatigue—Sketches in request—Bailleul—Baths and  lunatics—How to conduct a war. CHAPTER XXV  Getting stale—Longing for change—We leave the Douve—On the  march—Spotted fever—Ten days' rest. CHAPTER XXVI  A pleasant change—Suzette, Berthe and Marthe—"La jeune  fille farouche"—André. CHAPTER XXVII  Getting fit—Caricaturing the Curé—"Dirty work ahead"—A  projected attack—Unlooked-for orders. CHAPTER XXVIII  We march for Ypres—Halt at Locre—A bleak camp and meagre  fare—Signs of battle—First view of Ypres. CHAPTER XXIX  Getting nearer—A lugubrious party—Still nearer—Blazing  Ypres—Orders for attack. CHAPTER XXX  Rain and mud—A trying march—In the thick of it—A wounded  officer—Heavy shelling—I get my "quietus!"  CHAPTER XXXI  Slowly recovering—Field hospital—Ambulance train—Back in  England.   
LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS
"Bruce Bairnsfather: a photograph"
"The Birth of "Fragments": Scribbles on the farmhouse walls"
That Astronomical Annoyance, the Star Shell, Which Momentarily Enables You to Scrutinize the Kind of Mud You Are In
An Impression of the Famous Bois de Ploegsteet
"A Hopeless Dawn: Rain, Mud, Damp Coke, and Dug-Out Off Down Stream "
"The usual line in Billeting Farms: A Three-Sided Red-Tiled Building, With a Rectangular Smell in the Middle"
"Chuck us the biscuits, Bill. The fire wants mendin'"
"Shut that blinkin' door. There's a 'ell of a draught in 'ere"
"A Memory of Christmas, 1914: 'Look at this bloke's buttons, 'Arry. I should reckon 'e 'as a maid to dress 'im."
What He Doesn't KnowAbout Fire Buckets and the Time the Rum Comes Up Isn't Worth Knowing
A Messines Memory: "'Ow about shiftin' a bit further down the road, Fred?"
"Old soldiers never die"
Photograph of the Author. St. Yvon, Christmas Day, 1914 Officers, 2nd Lieutenant: 1 Bairnsfathers, Bruce: 1 Holes, Shell: 1
Off "in" again
"Poor old Maggie
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